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You've reached Dr. Jonathan Reid. Please leave me a message.

Date: 2019-04-28 02:37 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] definingfuture
definingfuture: (T - Sometimes I hate myself.)
[Tony looks uncomfortable in his own room. He's sitting slumped forward on the couch with a glass of water set on the table in front of him, untouched. Like he's in a hospital waiting room. He looks up when Jonathan somehow enters the room, but he doesn't stand or prepare to fight. He accepts the direction, sitting up straight and trying to breathe with steady, deep breaths. The tech in his body tells him it's running just fine, but he doesn't want to believe that.]

Date: 2019-04-28 03:00 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] definingfuture
definingfuture: (T - Instant regret.)
[The crestfallen look Tony gives Jonathan when he tells him the negative result says he knew the truth and just didn't want to hear it. He needs something external, something he can fix instead of grappling with his own mind.]

Yeah. I guess if you think it'll help...

[If only by pretending they are doing something for a while. He might be able to gather his thoughts by then.]

Date: 2019-04-28 03:55 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] definingfuture
definingfuture: (T - This is called having a crisis.)
[The funny thing is that Tony is almost unusually healthy. The programming keeps him fit, telling his body to regenerate and work at optimal human levels. He can even heal from injuries, leaving him strangely unmarred for a person who should be fighting regularly and at least working with heavy tools. He takes to the physical smoothly enough, letting Jonathan guide him through small motions that mean he has something to concentrate on. His mind wants to go other places. He might not have eaten or slept for a while. He doesn't seem to recall that.]

You're saying I'm imagining things.

[He expected that much. He laces his fingers together as he sits in place, frowning darkly. What does he do when he needs to get out? The look in his eyes changes just slightly. It's hard to tell when he's got a flat expression anyway, but there's a bit more concentration and a brief, subtle light behind the irises. Then the armor in the corner comes to life and walks over to them.]

Date: 2019-04-28 05:57 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] definingfuture
definingfuture: (IM - I'd like to see you do better.)
I let my friend get murdered because we didn't agree on how to save the most lives.

[Tony's answer comes out flat, through the armor rather than through his own mouth. It turns to speak to Jonathan instead, acting as though it really contains a man inside while Tony sits motionless in his seat.]

He's a good man. Of course he wouldn't blame me for that. He doesn't blame anyone as much as he should, but he's wrong. The future needs him to exist.

[He's technically out of his head? And while Tony sits still the armor settles some of his anxious energy by opening one of the panels on his left arm. It starts tinkering with tools built into the right, making adjustments while it talks.]

Date: 2019-04-28 06:15 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] definingfuture
definingfuture: (T - All we ever do is fight.)
[The lack of emotion has a soothing effect. Jonathan's cold reason and working on wiring help him detach himself from the heat of the moment. Normally, Tony might try to find a good chess partner, but he's been so off his footing lately he just hasn't thought to step back and do that. And he never does well when Steve becomes a topic.]

It doesn't matter. I just- You wanted to know how I get out of my head. This is out.

[It's not completely out, but it's keeping him busy. The tinkering doesn't stop while Tony talks, because the armor doesn't have to see its own circuits to know what is or isn't there.]

He's really here. In the city. He called and asked me what I remembered. When I told him, he said he just got better and not to blame myself.

[This time Tony turns his own head to look at Jonathan, speaking simultaneously through the armor and his own voice.]

When we last fought, I got him arrested. He was going to be put on trial. He was shot before he even got there. We've been arguing here too. Since he got here.

Date: 2019-04-28 07:02 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] definingfuture
definingfuture: (T - I can brood too. See?)
[He's working, so that still counts. He's just also being an eccentric weirdo about it.]

I can't just forget it. You don't understand what he meant to everyone.

[The armor stops talking, but it does keep working on its arm even while Tony gets up and starts moving around the room restlessly.]

I don't want to ruin anything with him. I know he wants me to- to act like everything is normal, but when he died, it hurt all of us. You don't realize how much one life costs until it's gone and the world starts falling apart. One person. But we needed him.

Date: 2019-05-06 12:36 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] definingfuture
definingfuture: (T - This is called having a crisis.)
But I- I don't. I don't know that he'll return.

[At least now that he has to concentrate on what the armor is doing he is calmer. His voice sounds almost normal. It could be a regular visit, despite the breakdown he obviously just had, until the armor looks up to Tony and speaks.]

We can tighten the power consumption. Increase the efficiency by 2%

Yeah. I'll need to open things up. I don't want to make a mess yet. [He keeps going, talking to Jonathan like that's a normal transition.] He could be from a parallel universe like the others. An alternate timeline that my people will never see. You don't really get over destroying your country's favorite icon, Doc. It's-

They haven't forgiven me. I do believe in the future. I believe in my choice. But I never thought it would come with that kind of cost.

Date: 2019-05-08 12:22 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] definingfuture
definingfuture: (T - Who said I'm a good guy?)
No.

[ Tony's tone drops to something serious when Jonathan talks about reputation. ]

Asking for too many details can upset the flow of time. I try to change things and that upsets the future. Maybe I get him back and maybe I end up costing us innocent lives in the process. I don't want to know how it works out.

[ Tony looks up and as he does the armor raises its head from the work it was doing to look at Jonathan at the same time. There's a bit of blue light that comes from within Tony's eyes, echoing more strongly in the armor as it does whatever it does and a light goes on. ]

He was a hero. A symbol to an entire nation of hope and everything we want to be but can't. I'm not worried about what they think of me, I'm worried that they're right to think it. You don't have to know about me or him or anything else. I've been trying to make sure they're still safe, and that they still have something to believe in.

And now I'm here. [He waves a hand at the room.] Playing lab rat because we can't get a signal out.

Date: 2019-05-14 03:51 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] definingfuture
definingfuture: (T - Nothing beside remains.)
I already did that. [Tony's answer is a bit too abrupt. He's still half in the armor, moving its arm in a sweeping gesture that he doesn't do himself.]

I made sure the symbol lived on. That his legacy wouldn't be damaged. It's not better.

[The frustration wells up again, impulsive and uncontrolled, because Tony doesn't know what to do.]

It didn't fix it.

[Humility. Tony actually scowls at that.]

You want me to fix things here. I don't want to spend more time here. I want to go back and make sure my world hasn't actually exploded while I was gone.

[Except it hasn't and Jonathan is right and he hates it.]

If I start fixing things here then I'm accepting the chance I'm not going back. And I've been trying.

[With no success at all, but that certainly isn't a first. But now Steve is here and the future is apparently fine. What is left to fix but what is right in front of him?]

I am, you know. The authority on safety in my world.

[The flare of anger dies down and the armor goes back to rearranging the power grid, closing the metal panel when it is finished and charging energy into the palm when it finishes.]

Date: 2019-05-14 04:34 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] definingfuture
definingfuture: (T - This is called having a crisis.)
I'm already trying to do that. Either they are completely cut off from outside signals or they have one hell of a jammer. Honestly? I'm putting money on the former. Their tech is nice, but it wouldn't be enough to block every distress call sent out from this world. Someone should have picked up by now.

[ The armor returns to standing like a display piece next to Tony like it was never moving at all. Now in a new home, it seems, facing Jonathan, but the light has gone out. ]

And you don't have to make fun of me. I know it sounds ridiculous to you, but in my world we actually have people who work on a global scale. I'm not saying I'm irreplaceable. I'm just saying the alternatives were bad when I took the job. Why do you think I took it?

[ He knows what he's like. He just knows what other people are like too. ]

As far as a lot of my people are concerned, I'm the one that helped destroy that symbol. They don't trust me or anyone still working with me. And they happen to be armed. Some of them are more reckless than others. It's not just about survival. It's about making sure the guy taking my place doesn't want to see us tear ourselves apart.

[ At least now his head is clearer. Talking and getting the frustration out is actually calming. ]

I just... I told myself I was okay with this. Doing it alone if that's what it took. Never seeing him again. And now it's just over.

Date: 2019-05-22 12:10 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] definingfuture
definingfuture: (T - Thank you. I know what I said.)
What makes you think this place has a future?

[There it is. The unfair, bitter sentiment surrounding everything. He's been avoiding it all, trying not to look at anything too hard, because if he starts accepting things enough to take on projects and engage in anything outside of just trying to get out, then he'll have to face the fact he's doing more than just killing time and going to leave.

He'll have to make actual effort and care about Duplicity. And on some level Tony is drained of caring. He wants to lose; to be told he just can't achieve anything so he can give up.]


That... That's just a personal project. I brought it with me. I don't think he'll do much good here.

[But now he has to consider it. There's no ducking out this time.]

Date: 2019-05-23 04:11 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] definingfuture
definingfuture: (Default - I never sleep.)
[Well, damn. He can't escape that logic. The sigh Tony gives Jonathan is proof that he knows when he's been beaten. Maybe he really just needed to throw a tantrum.]

You remind me of someone.

[He smiles wryly.]

It's a suit. I used to use it for security, yeah. That was the original purpose. Safety and keeping me alive. But then I realized that it could help keep other people safe too. And then we started seeing bigger problems and bigger threats and he just became necessary. Now he's just part of me.

But here he's just a suit.

Date: 2019-05-24 01:11 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] definingfuture
definingfuture: (T - You did what with the pole?)
He was a good friend. My mentor, I guess you could say.

[The expression Tony has is between fond and dark.]

Do submissives really want someone calling themselves a dominant in their space? To them, I've given donations, but I think that enforcement might be seen as less help and more compliant to the program.

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] definingfuture - Date: 2019-05-26 03:28 am (UTC) - Expand